The Poop Post

At the very ripe, and impressionable age of 10, I stumbled upon a list on the internet. The list was of every kind of poop ever invented. It opened my world up, I was in love for the first time. Since then I have not been able to find the list again. I've tried searching for it on Google but I can't remember exactly what I searched. It was probably something close to "poop funny," or "good poop." These were the most evolved thoughts I had as a 10 year old. Poop, candy, and playing. All day every day. School, family, and friends were only obstacles in the way of entertaining these thoughts on a full time schedule.
Anyway as a tribute to the original "poop list" I have put together my own poop list. Some were taken from what I can remember of the list and some have been added by yours truly.
Enjoy.

1. Race Car Poopie
This is that kind of poop when the poop is in such a rush to get down the toilet that it leaves a skid mark in the bowl, similar to that of a race car's.

2. Invisible Poopie a.k.a. Hide-n-Seek Poopie
This is that kind of poop when you know you pooped, you felt it come out, you may have even heard it. But when you look in the toilet. BOOOOM! it's gone.

Little known fact; the poop is actually just hiding in the tube

 3. Magician Poopie
This is that kind of poop when you definitely pooped. You heard it, you felt it, and now you even see it. BUT, when you wipe there is nothing on the toilet paper. How does he do it? magic!

4. Linkin Log Poopie
This is that kind of poop that is so long you are actually scared to flush it down because it might break the toilet, so you start chopping it up into smaller pieces with that brush that cleans the toilet.

5. Sideways Poopie
This is that kind of poop that hurts so bad you could swear it's coming out sideways.

6. Cannonball Poopie
This is that kind of poop that splashes your bottom when it hits the water. It's like that one friend that gets in the cold water before everyone else and insists it isn't that cold by splashing you and your friends. Jerk.

7. Indecisive Poopie
This is that kind of poop that cannot decide if it wants to be a poop or a fart. Most times you end up just sitting on the toilet farting your brains out trying to poop, because let's face it, poops are better than farts. But don't tell farts that.
Farts: "Your not better'n me."

8. The Never Ending Poopie, Poopie
This is that kind of poop that sticks out of the water and disappears down the whole. Measuring it's length is impossible so it turns into a Linkin Log Poopie.

They turned this into a children's book and it was only like 10 pages. What nerve!?